Day 5 of our Personal Best 30 Day Challenge and my attempt at eventual transformation has proven more difficult than anticipated. ARGG! I am the leader! I’m the one that has thrown down the gauntlet! Am I going to let this challenge make minced meat out of me?
I have stayed true to my 30 minutes of evening meditation however; my day game is way off. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t beat myself up about this however; my goal is to augment my spiritual acuity, not redistribute it.
In my desperation about my encroaching imperfection, this afternoon, I consulted my spiritual mentor. Let me share a little of the conversation and insight from our talk.
My husband, Keith, and I live in a loft; one open room with a living space, kitchen, bedroom area and bathroom. (Kind of cool…really.)
Keith likes to watch TV every night. He’s hard of hearing so the volume is always LOUD. When he finally goes to bed and all is quiet, (so I think) he starts rustling around in bed, adjusting the pillows, shifting the sheets and blankets and disrupting the tranquility that exists without TV.
I begin my new evening ritual of meditation as he tosses side to side- 20 minutes- 30 minutes. Then he gets up and proceeds to the bathroom, turns on the light and takes care of his business.
I, on the other hand, am still on the couch sitting in lotus. When all is finally quiet, I go deep into meditation. However, by that time, it’s midnight.
My morning ritual usually begins at 5:00 or 5:30 am and it includes my morning meditation. Lately, I’ve been getting to bed so late- I haven’t wanted to get out of bed at the crack of dawn. Frankly, I’m tired!!
Evening meditations have always been a challenge because my workdays are typically very intense. I’m simply too fatigued to go into a deep mediation at night. Now that I’ve redesigned my life to conserve more energy throughout the day, I find my evening environment is not conducive to reaching Samadhi (a deep meditative state).
So, in my mentor’s infinite wisdom, she guided me into realizing that mornings are the best time for me to meditate at home. It’s quiet, Keith is fast asleep, and there’s no TV. I feel I’ve accomplished something positive for myself each day and created space in my heart and mind. I have meditated.
The insight; I can find another time and place to practice my second bout of meditation. It doesn’t have to be at the end of the day sitting at home. See, as my mentor was guiding me through this turbulence, I was sitting on the Palos Verdes bluff watching the waves crash against the rocky shoreline, the sun was slowly setting and all around me was peace, tranquility and my little pocket of heaven. Hah, now I know what I must do, I can make this work.