Emotional intelligence is measured by watching how we react emotionally to situations as they arise in our lives. You have the opportunity to increase your emotional intelligence by learning new behaviours that will allow you to act more appropriately as well as feel less emotional stress when faced with challenging situations. One of the best ways to improve your EQ is to learn to be mindful so says Master Oh.
Mindfulness is practiced by many Eastern religions and is very deep set in Buddhist beliefs. Mindfulness allows you to live in the moment and in essence will remove the stresses of worry and provide you with the mindset to handle difficult situations as they arise. Teaching yourself to be mindful will help you discard some of the inherited emotional challenges you have learned since you were a child and help you break the cycle of reacting in a less than desirable way.
Unfortunately even the most loving parents can teach us behaviour that can lower our emotional quotients. When we are taught to over react with anger, tears or shouting it is very difficult to act any other way. These negative emotions are generated almost naturally as they have been learned since we were infants and because they are emotions we cannot deny them. However you can learn to control them using mindfulness.
How to be Mindful
Mindfulness takes discipline but can eventually become second nature. The simplest of exercises will slowly teach you how to be mindful. For example, when getting ready in the morning consider every aspect of your preparation. When brushing your teeth count the amount of brush strokes. When eating your breakfast focus on chewing and swallowing. When you apply your makeup or shave stay in the moment watching your hand work to prepare you for your day. Do the same walking to the bus, sitting on the train, driving in your car. Stay completely focused on what you are doing and when other thoughts try to invade accept them and then let them go.
How to Handle Emotions
As you become more aware of your actions physically you will begin to be more aware in your mind. This means you can then begin to focus on improving your behaviour and actions. The most important thing about being mindful is it is not suppressing emotions. It is actually quite the opposite. You want to feel and experience your emotions, but let them go so you can make a calm and rational decision on your reactions. You have heard the instruction to count to 10 when angry. This is mindfulness 101. When you are living in the moment and something happens that makes you angry you are better prepared to count to ten, gain composure and offer a constructive response as opposed to a destructive one. As well you will understand that there are times when it is best to walk away and handle the situation at a different time when others involved have had time to compose them selves as well.
You can begin to teach yourself to be more mindful starting today in order to gain better control over your emotions and live a happier, calmer life.